European Food According To The Greeks

Map created by Yanko TsvetkovThe map above looks at how the Greeks view cuisine from the rest of Europe. It’s the work Yanko Tsvetkov and was created in 2015 as part of his Atlas of Prejudice map series.

Titled the Culinary Map of Europe According to Greece, it’s a funny look at how the Greeks look at the rest of Europe’s food choices.

But before continuing, keep in mind this map is satire.

It plays on (often unfair) stereotypes or rivalries that Greeks might jokingly apply to various neighbors.

None of these are serious judgments on real cuisine!

Iceland – “Ice”
- Joke: From a southern European (Greek) perspective, Iceland might be imagined as a frozen land with little else but ice.
Ireland – “Dirty Beer”
- Joke: Refers to the Irish love of stouts and ales (e.g., Guinness). Possibly implying that the beer is “dark” or “muddy looking.”
United Kingdom – “Culinary Austerity”
- Joke: Plays on British stereotypes: boiled vegetables, “plain” food, and the idea that British cuisine can be under-seasoned.
Portugal – “Tasteless Fish”
- Joke: Portugal is famous for salt cod (bacalhau). A Greek might tease that if it’s not Greek fish, it’s “tasteless.”
Spain – “Mutant Pigs”
- Joke: Spain is renowned for jamón ibérico and many pork dishes; the “mutant” angle is just a comedic exaggeration.
France – “Mushy Bread”
- Joke: Although France is known for world‑famous baguettes and bread, the Greek stereotype here might be that it’s too soft or “fluffy.”
Belgium/Netherlands – “Meh” / “Yuk”
- Joke: A dismissive take on Belgian fries, waffles, and Dutch cheeses or herring. Possibly that it’s unexciting or weird to Greek tastes.
Germany – “Nazi Food”
- Joke: A very pointed (and deliberately provocative) stereotype, referencing historical WWII animosity and the idea that Greek–German relations can be fraught (especially during the Eurozone crisis).
Switzerland – “Bad Milk”
- Joke: Possibly mocking Swiss dairy (cheese, chocolate) as “overrated” from a Greek viewpoint or might be a dig at Nestle.
Czech Republic – “Sour Beer”

- Joke: The Czechs are famous for beer (Pilsner), and “sour” might be a snide comment that it’s too bitter or strong for Greek tastes.

Austria – “Stale Cakes”

- Joke: Central Europe is known for pastries, tortes, and strudels. The Greek stereotype might be that they’re heavy or dry.

Poland/Baltic region – “Stale Cookies”

- Joke: Eastern European baked goods might seem plain or unexciting compared to Greek sweets (like baklava).

Slovakia – “Nothing”

- Joke: A dismissive idea that Slovakia doesn’t have any noteworthy cuisine in Greek eyes—obviously untrue, but it’s the gag.

Hungary – “Rotten Peppers”

- Joke: Possibly mocking Bulgarian dishes with peppers, or the fermentation/pickling tradition.

Denmark (labeled “Fake Feta”)

- Joke: A direct jab at Danish feta, which had to renamed because of EU food naming rules.

Italy – “Coffee with Soap”

- Joke: Italians are known to love Espresso which while strong is not as strong as Greek coffee. The “soap” bit could be mocking mild or foamy coffee.

Sweden + Finland – “Fart‑Flavored Herring”

- Joke: A clear reference to surströmming, Sweden’s notoriously pungent fermented herring.

Norway – “Moss and Lichen”

- Joke: Norway’s cuisine can involve foraged items in a cold climate, so from a Greek point of view, “They must eat moss and lichen.”

Russia – “Aftershave Drinkers”

- Joke: A jab at the Russian stereotype of drinking extremely strong alcohol (vodka), so strong it might as well be aftershave.

“Ocean of Tasteless Tuna” (Atlantic)

- Joke: Greeks pride themselves on Mediterranean seafood. They might mock the Atlantic fish as too bland or industrial.

Neighboring Balkans – “Culinary Plagiarists”

- Joke: Greece often jokes that neighboring countries “copy” Greek recipes (e.g., baklava, coffee, yogurt).

Turkey (farther east) – “Counterfeit Greek Food”

- Joke: Similar to “plagiarists”—the jibe is that Turkish cuisine is just “copied” or “counterfeit” Greek fare.
- Example: Dishes like dolma, tzatziki/cacık, or Turkish coffee vs. Greek coffee are famously contested.

Greece – “Real Food”

Joke: Self‑congratulatory label: from a Greek standpoint, only Greek cuisine is truly authentic and delicious.
Example: “We have souvlaki, moussaka, dolmades—this is real cooking.”

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